Happy New Year and stuff

I hope everyone has a fantastic New Years celebration. If you have kiddos, put them to bed early and drink. If you have kids and are lucky enough to have sitter and go out...I hope you get a hang over. I kid, I kid!! This leads me to my first New Years Resolution...stop being catty, ok ummm...stop being so catty. Yep, I like that one better. We actually do get to go out for New Years. We are going over to party at my parents friends house. We are bringing the girls and putting them down when we get there. They live two doors down from my parents, so if we drink too much we can just go to their house and sleep it off. I hope that next year is a better one for so many of my friends and family.

Ok, I need to review two more face creams, I will make it short and sweet. Precision Chanel, SPF30. Ladies save your 95.00, unless you want to smell like an old woman. Not only is the smell overwhelming, but the product is very runny. It made my face feel sticky when applied. Once again I can't judge it's SPF effectiveness since the only "outdoor" time I got was walking to my car. The next product is Canyon Ranch SPF 30 moisturizer, 75.00. It smelled like bread dough, very yeasty. Perhaps some people like the smell of fresh baked bread, I however am not a fan if it is slathered on my face. It was sticky and smelly. I was also concerned by the tingling sensation that I felt. I have a sneaky suspicion that this product is the reason why I have a giant zit between my eyes.

Am I really watching this?

the girls are in bed, the house is quite, Jeff isn't working on his computer...time for some QT (quality TV that is)! Have you ever been mortified about a show that you are watching, but you just can't seem to turn it off? Jeff, "Mr.I only watch Discovery channel or sports" and I watched the entire episode of Mamma's Boys on NBC. "Momma's Boys" is a new dating series that centers on three possessive yet loving mothers who must help their complacent sons choose the perfect woman - and ultimately poses the question: "Who is really the most important woman in every man's life?" That is a quote from NBC. The truth of the matter is the show revolves around several "perfectly surgically altered" women vying for three guys attention. Their momma's get to help decide. Go figure, the men are attracted to the porn star, the spokes model, and the cocktail waitress. The mothers like the doctor, the vet, well you get the picture. It was horrible, but deliciously entertaining.

What would you do for a dollar

Sorry I have been unable to post lately. Jeff has been off of work, so we have been doing a ton of family things. Today we went to the gym. I had just finished my hour on the elliptical and was ready for some de-stressing in the eucalyptus steam room. then I heard the dreaded, "Melissa K, please come to the child center". Crap! I was hoping that it was just a poop diaper, I could change Claire and go back. Nope! Claire had decided that she had to go potty. I have mentioned before that although she is not 2 yet, she has been potty training herself. When she has to go she takes everything waist down off and yells, "potty". Apparently, she did that at the gym, but she was unable to attract the attention of any of the staff so she relieved herself on the floor. A portion of her pants got wet. I was a bad mom, and had been delinquent in stocking a fresh change of clothes for the girls in the diaper bag. So, I figured that I would just put a new diaper on Claire and we would all head home. Ella had other plans. She decided that she did not want to go home, and removed her shoes and began climbing into the maze. It took several minutes of threatening, and bribing to get her out. She was sobbing and I tried to explain why we had to go home. She replied,"I don't like it when Claire goes potty!" she then chose to wet her own pants in pure defiance. So, now I had two children with pee pee pants and no change of clothes. It is one thing to leave the gym with a kiddo in a diaper, it is another to leave with a bare bottom. I decided that I had to run to the car and get my secret stash of clothes( the bag of clothes that I have been meaning to bring to Goodwill). I ran like the wind to the car, just to discover that I had left my keys in the child care center. I made another mad dash, dressed the kiddos in a size two small clothes and got the heck out of there. Then I made another screwy decision. Thought that I would tempt fate and run in to Target to return something. To make a long story short, both girl managed on on two separate occasions to fall out of the cart. Those giant two seat, unwieldy, "fun" looking carts with the broken seat belts, suck. We were all three sobbing when I got them back into the car. Why did I HAVE to return an item that was from the Dollar bin? Pure madness!!!

Merry Christmas!

We had a fantastic Christmas. I am so sad it is over. Now I have to go through al of the girls old toys and get rid of a few of them. i should have done that BEFORE Christmas. It was a very pink holiday. Ella received several dance outfits and tap and ballet shoes. She is starting dance in two weeks. She is so excited and has been wearing her leotard and tights the past two days. Luckily it is 80 degrees here, I don't have to worry about her getting cold. Claire raked in the presents too, her favorite is a little tea set. She has spent hours arranging her little set. The one present that I spent the most on was shunned by both girls. I am considering re gifting it next year, it was too expensive to be ignored!

facebook friend?

I have 97 friends on facebook. Deep down it makes me feel good to know that many people. 97 people know who I am! I should know by now, that cocky is not a good emotion for me, I always come crashing down. I must admit there have been a few people requesting to be my friend that I honestly don't know. On the other hand my memory is bad, and as a child we moved every three years. I figure there is always a possibility that I know these people. I should ask them how they know me, but that would just be embarrassing. I received a friend request from someone with my exact same name, first and last. I chose to ignore the request because it is just a little bit creepy, I don't know her and what if she is making my name look bad. Do I want to be associated with a much younger, cuter version of myself with the same name? Then it hit me...she wants to be able to tell me that some of my friends are really her friends. The humiliation! Is it just me or does facebook force you to revert to your JR high self?

FYI

I love getting Christmas cards and reading about other peoples lives. They always make me either realize just how fortunate I am or how lazy I am. I have read sad news from friends and others I am in awe of all that they do. Tomorrow is Christmas Eve and I am feeling a little melancholy. I LOVE Christmas, the decorations, the feeling, and the closer we get to Christmas the sooner we will need to take everything down.

On another note, I thought that I would review my free skin products on my blog. Let me first remind everyone that I am cheap and only buy cosmetics at the grocery store with a coupon, so take my reviews with a grain of salt.

Zo Oclipse™ Sunscreen + Primer SPF 30...85.00
Compared to my usual SPF skin cream, it is like leaving Walmart and going into Sax...with a gift card. This stuff was great. It was semi thick and went on my skin making it feel velvety smooth. It had a little bit of a tint to it. I was afraid that it would be obvious on my pastey white skin, but nope, it just smoothed everything out. There was very little fragrance, which I like. I can't really judge its effectiveness as far as SPF is concerned. It has been gray and rainy here.

Streaker

I have been so busy lately and have not had the chance to update my blog. On Friday, I took Ella to see Disney Playhouse live. We had great seats, but it was really disappointing. It was so lame. I couldn't believe this was a Disney production. Ella loved it, but Disney must be hurting if they put their name on this. The sets were so cheap, I have seen high school productions that had better set designs. I'm glad she enjoyed it but I don't think that I will ever spend the 60 dollars on another Disney production.

I have been trying to help my Mom out with her baking, and ladies brunch. we still have some wrapping to get done, but I am not feeling panicked at all. It is so nice. Jeff has the next two weeks off, I am hoping that I will get some time with my girlfriends.

Claire is doing well potty training herself. Yesterday she went poo on the potty. She is great about letting us know when she has to go. She strips off her pants and diaper, grabs her self and yells "potty!" Not bad for a 22 month old, the problem is that she strips not only in the comfort of our house, but in public as well. If she has to go,she has to go! So, if you see a semi nude child running around Target, she is mine. Perhaps I should start shopping at Walmart, it wouldn't be too unusual there. Walmart prices are great, but I have seen some pretty interesting things! Streaker

Tag I'm it

Jeff has been working until 2:00 am the past few days. Poor guy. I almost feel guilty heading to bed at 10:30. I was sleeping soundly last night until I had a strange dream. In my dream my tummy was in extreme pain. I woke up with a start and realized that it was no dream. I can thank Claire for my trips to the porcelain God all night/morning. I got her bug. How nice of her to share. I struggled through the day. The girls were actually really good. I have to thank their Gran and Opa for making the day bearable. We received a large box from them in the mail. It was full of Christmas presents. The girls enjoyed placing the packages under the tree, but what they really loved was the box the items came in. Two hours of box play. Whoo Hoo! My tummy is better, but I am exhausted. I am off to bed. Poor Jeff is once again stuck in his hole(office). I throw food to him now and then. I only hope that Ella doesn't get the bug next, we have a very busy weekend planned!

Score!

I scored again! A few months ago I applied to be a tester for SELF's 10th annual Healthy Beauty Awards. This afternoon a mysterious box arrived on my door step. I could almost hear my husbands thoughts...what did you spend money on now. NOTHING!!! I received 5 SPF skin care products to try. Let me first explain that my skin care regime has been reduced to soap and water and some sort of moisturizer purchased with a coupon at the grocery store. There was a time long, long, ago when I bought my cosmetics and creams at department stores. Sigh... Anyway, I was THRILLED to get five brand name products. These are products that I would never buy...one of them is 154 dollars for a small tube. Yes, I did look all of them up. So basically I got over 300 dollars in SPF moisturizers. I have to try them for two days each and write about them. Thank you Self!

On another note, Ella had her first performance today. Her little preschool class was performing a song. I had to miss it due to my job. Jeff and my mom were able to attend, but it killed me. I sobbed all the way to work. There will never be another "first performance". Guilt and motherhood go hand in hand. I was able to watch the video and sure enough Ella was the loudest. She was also about a beat ahead of the music. I was so proud! Jeff also taped another classes performance. One little girl picked her nose and snacked on her little nasal morsels the entire song. Nice!

Flesh wound

FISHY LIVES!!!! After being tossed from his little bowl by a curious one year old, fishy has made a miraculous recovery. His little fin is a bit torn, merely a flesh wound!

One fish, two fish, red fish, screwed fish

Claire is still sick. She threw up all night last night. She is such a little trooper. She called for us just before she threw up so that we could take her to the potty. She really tried to help out. I went to work today. We thought that Claire would just sleep and lay around since she had been sick all night. I forgot who we were dealing with! I left for work, Jeff dropped Claire off at my parents while he dropped Ella off at school. He picked her back up and came home. He settled her down in front of a movie with blankets, towels and pedialyte and got to work. Claire just didn't feel like moping around, she wanted to play. Jeff did his best to get her occupied with something. He had to run upstairs quick to get the power cord for his computer when he heard a gush of water and a scream. He flew down the stairs and there was our little beta's fish bowl laying on the carpeted floor. Poor Fishy was flopping all around. Jeff did his best to save Fishy and clean up the mess. I came home and got to work on salvaging the carpet. There is nothing like the faint odor of fish in the air, reminds me of Sea World. Poor fishy is not quite sure if he wants to live. One of his little fins looks tattered and he is refusing to eat, but at least he finally has a clean bowl! I have a feeling he won't be with us in the morning. On the bright side, we are one step closer to wood floors because I really am not sure how long we can stand the lovely fishy aroma.

Fishy Update: Hanging out at the bottom of the bowl, hope he is just playing dead...he fluttered his little fins. So far so good,I hope there is not a trip to pet smart in our future. Claire keeps saying, "Fishy sick..oh no", Ella keeps saying, "My poor fishy, naughty Claire, Santa save my fishy!"

Christmas P A R T Y

We finally had a Christmas party to attend. My husband's work does not do parties, so I was thrilled when my new company sent out invites. It was at someones house, there was fantastic food, wine, beer...nice. Jeff and I got fixed up and dropped the kiddos at my parents house. We could only stay at the party for 1 hour 15 minutes. It was better than nothing. I had just poured my second glass of wine when we go the call. Claire had thrown up twice, you need to get her. So much for my party. My nice mellow mood dissipated once I encountered the lovely stench of vomit. We are home now and poor Claire has been sick five times, two of them on my shirt. Happy Holidays!

DONE!

I am done with my shopping, cards, and cookies. Yes!!!!! Today we went to Nordstom's for the annual breakfast with Santa. It was so cute watching the girls this year. Last year Claire was just crawling and now she is running. Ella loved Santa. Claire was not too sure about him. She refused to look at him while sitting in his lap.

Are you happy now?

Today while Ella was in the bathroom going poopy, I asked her if she was done...she replied, "No Mommy, where there is poopy there is tinkle. They are good friends. They play together". I totally cracked up. She is really at such a cute age now. We were at the store this morning picking out a gift for her Daddy. I asked her what she would like to get him she said socks. I asked why, she said because he has stinky socks and needs some good smelly ones. Sure enough, she picked out socks. While at the store, Claire decided that she did not want to be held. I was helping Ella pick out the right size socks and noticed that Claire had strolled off. I found her molesting a mannequin. She is obsessed with snaps and zippers...so there she was playing with the zipper on male mannequin. I pulled her away from the mannequin's crotch and told the girls that I was feeling angry and frustrated that we couldn't go shopping together. Ella began singing in her shrill little voice, "My Mommy is pretty...she is so cute, she is bootiful." Then she glanced over at me and asked, so are you happy now Mommy???

sleepy

I am off to bed. My haircut went great. I was able to avoid my usual mistake of too much wine and scissors before my scheduled appointment. My hair stylist was thrilled that I didn't take my mane into my own hands, she has pointed out that I have no scissor skills. My hair looks great and now I am going to bed. What a waste of a good hair day. I came to the conclusion that I would be a hideous bald woman. My hair was all balled up under the towel at the salon and I had a few minutes to really look at myself. Scary...

I wish

I wish I was one of the girls at the gym that always has matching bra and panties. Tim Gunn would be clicking his tongue at me if he saw the ratty undergarments that wear. I do have a few choice items from before kiddos...but that just takes too much effort. They are hand wash only for goodness sakes!

Random thoughts

1. Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a race car not called a racist?
2. Why is the man who invests all your money called a ‘broker’?
3. Do bald men wash their head with soap or shampoo?
4. What hair color do they put on the driver’s licenses of bald men?
5. Why are the obituaries found in the “living” section of the newspaper?
6. Are one handed people offended when police tell them to put their hands up?
7. How can sweet and sour sauce be sweet and sour at the same time?
8. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?
9. If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
10. What if you’re in hell, and you’re mad at someone, where do you tell them to go?

Parenting rule of thumb..never get cocky

The past few weeks Claire has done a great job of going on the potty. She asks to use it and goes every time. She has no fear of public restrooms or automatic flushing toilets. Yesterday we broke a record, she went potty 5 times! I was telling Jeff that I had visions of diaper free days in our future. After dinner, Jeff went to Home depot and I gave the girls a bath. Claire went potty at her request before she got in the tub. I had drug over the mountains of laundry to be folded out in the hallway so that I could fold and watch them in the tub. The girls were having a blast and I was making a dent in the laundry when I heard..."Oh no Mommy, Oh no Mommy" in a panic stricken voice from little Claire. I scooted over to the tub to see what was wrong. There was a beautifully formed turd floating in the bath. Claire was very upset, but not as upset as Ella who screamed and about getting stinky. I evacuated the tub and threw the girls into our bathtub to de-fecalfy them. Once Jeff got home, I ordered him to finish the baths while I embraced the joy of scooping the floating turd out of the water. Of course, by then it had started to come apart. I spent about 35 minutes cleaning the bath tub and all of the toys. Like I said, never feel too cocky about your parenting skills...there is always another lesson to be learned!

Beware of the Doghouse

Make your husbands watch this one ladies!

Queen of free

Last night my girlfriend and I headed downtown for the Holiday window lighting. All of the boutiques had free wine and champagne as well as yummy appetizers. It was a blast. There was some excellent people watching as well. All I can say is just because you have money doesn't mean you have taste. Once again the sweater dress brigade was in full force. There was even a gold lamae sweater dress and matching gold boots on a 60 year old. My friend and I decided to pretend like we belonged with the wealthy. I added a 1,4890 dollar necklace to my wish list. This wish list will be covertly emailed to my husband via the shop. hehehe! I can imaging the look on Jeff's face. We stayed out until 12:30 am and didn't spend a dime. We actually walked away with money. One of the shops was having a drawing, they were just about to call names when I asked if we could quick fill out the entry form and put our names in as well. The first winner called was...ME, I won a 25 dollar gift card!! I could feel all 35 pairs of eyes in the room glaring at me. The second drawing was for a 50.00 gift card, the name called was a no show. The third name was my friend. I think we left the store with a few more enemies.

Bad santa

Tonight, I let Ella stay up so we could watch Rudolph on TV. It is the same one that we all have seen since childhood. As an adult, I looked at the movie in a whole different light. Santa is such a jerk! Could he be any more insensitive? I would really be concerned if he were really the one making out the good and bad list. Can you imagine, "Johnny is a gimp, it is all his parents fault..no presents for him."
The blatant stereotypes were laughable. "Rudolph went home to take care of the women". It is still a classic and I do love it even though the message is a little bit off. It's OK to be a freak, just be prepared to be laughed at and ridiculed but someday you just may be appreciated.

Jeff is working late again tonight, last night he was on the computer until midnight. He assures me that he has plenty of days off at Christmas. Tomorrow I am going with a few of my girlfriends to go window shopping downtown. There is suppose to be tons of freebies. Drinks, food and prizes...I am hoping to eat and drink for free tomorrow night. I need a girls night out. Yes! Ok, now back to writing my Christmas letter. I am averaging a sentence a day.

Everything but....

Ok, I am still working on my darn Christmas letter. I sat down with the intention to get it done. Well instead I decided that I would save a ton of money signing up for free samples. i spent the last hour signing up for everything from laundry detergent to tampons. I figured that they would be good stocking stuffers. Who am I kidding, like my soon to be sister in law really wants a panty liner and a super plus tampon in her stocking.

Tomorrow , tomorrow I love you tomorrow... your only an excuse away!

What the ???

Ok what is it... when I drink a few, ok three glasses of wine everything comes out. I am sobbing on the floor in the kitchen because I am so tired of begging for compliments. Ok, I admit it I am vain, I need that little pat on the back. I use to have a career where almost every day I was faced with compliments from students, parents, administration... now I try to be super mom and get ... My hubby tries, I am highly emotional, add a glass or two of wine and I am a mess. I really crave acknowledgment, admiration, and down right praise for all that I do. I tell my kiddos, "good job" numerous times a day. Why is it so darn hard?

Broke back wallet

Sorry I have not posted in awhile. We have been busy! the Christmas decorations are up, our yard is light up, and my Christmas letter is still unfinished. I actually cleaned the shower this weekend over writing the letter. I did not go to any big sales this year. The thought of fighting the crowds was not worth the 10.00 savings...that is until the credit card bill came. Oh my peas...I thought that I was being thrifty. The framing of two pictures was the nail on the coffin. I have these two huge canvas photos of each of the girls, they are beautiful and cost a pretty penny when we bought them. I have been meaning to get them framed for the past two years. I figured that I have a job now, so the money I make this ,month will go to the pictures. Apparently I have been justifying a few purchases with my earnings. My husband was mystified that a wood frame and some glass could cost that much. He did not seem to understand that I saved 65%, OK, he understood but it didn't make the jagged little pill easier to swallow. I am attaching a few photos of this weekend, one of the pictures is a movie. Cute!